Confession

Hi.

Sorry it's been so terribly long since I last posted here. I have a confession to make that might help you understand why I haven't been blogging.

As you know, my Mom is real sick. I guess it's not the kind of sickness that goes away after you take some nasty medicines from the babydoctor either because she's been sick for many months. And she goes and gets medicines every week or so and then comes home and feels crummy for a long time. She doesn't have a lot of energy most of the time so she can't take me to the dog park or for walks or very much of anything most days. Usually, we just lay around together and I try to guard the front door from intruders that might want to come in.

So my confession is this...Mom types my blog entries for me. Because...well...truth be told...I cannot type. I don't know how. My fingers don't spread apart enough to press the buttons right. So I have my mom type while I dictate what I want her to say on my behalf. And we all just pretend that it came from me anyway. It's always been a nice arrangement until lately when Mom just doesn't feel good enough to type for me. I can understand that. It's not like she doesn't get out at all. She's not bedridden all the time or anything. Sometimes she and Dad go out to dinner or shopping. In fact, a couple weeks ago, MomDad loaded me and Scarlett in the car and we drove all the way to Santa Fe for a few days! That was so much fun! And then MomDad had to stay at the hospital overnight one night so we got to stay at the Dog Hotel at Petsmart! That was fun!

Anyway, since Mom has to maintain her own blog on an almost daily basis, she doesn't have a lot of energy left to take pictures and help me type my own blog. We'll try very hard to do it more often though...maybe Dad could help out, too. I can't believe it has been so long since I last posted here! Jeeesh! Sorry about that.

So keep checking back. Eventually I can tell you all about my adventures chasing squirrels in the back yard and stuff. Take care!

Diaries

I'm not ashamed to admit it: I do keep a diary. But it's not sappy or stupid. It's a totally ManDogly account of my daily life and my favorite things that happen in it. Check out one of my most recent entires:

8:00 a.m.--Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 a.m.-- A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am.-- A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 a.m.--got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 p.m.--Lunch ! My favorite thing!
1:00 p.m.-- Played in the Yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 p.m.-- Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 p.m.-- Milk bones! My favorite thing!
7:00 p.m.--got to play ball ! My favorite thing!
8:00 p.m.-- Wow!! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!

11:00 p.m. Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Well today as I was rummaging through some stuff that I found, I discovered a page from another diary. It looks like a cat wrote it. I think it's Brudder's handwriting! Looksee:

Day 983 of my captivity. My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength. The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a 'good little hunter' I am. Bastards!! there was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of 'allergies.' I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage. today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow---but at the top of the stairs. I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released-- and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded. the bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now......

P.S. These are not really from my house. I gotted them from a email I gotted today from a friend. Sorry but I thought it would be funny to put on my blog today.

Rating my Humans

Hi! My buddy Deefor read a book about how to rate some things about other dogs. He decided to apply it to his MomDad which I thought was pretty cool. Then he asked us readers how we would rate our peoples. That sounds like fun. I'm going to rate my MomDad and Scarlett too.

Mom's a Herding dog, I think. She's always making sure everyone's where they should be and what they should be doing on time. She's a lil bossy.
Dominance- High. Like I said, she's kinda bossy. But she is NOT the boss of me. Sometimes I choose to not listen to her commands.
Intelligence- High. She reads a lot and has lots of opinions.
Emotions- High! Mad, happy, crying...I can't keep up but I'm always there to help out (unless she's mad, then you can find me in another room)
Sociability- Very friendly. She's always having friends over who let me lick and jump on them. She chooses good friends.
Energy- Variable. Usually higher in the mornings. Likes mid-afternoon naps like we dogs do.

Dad's a Retriever. Always going to get stuff for me or mom or Scarlett. Kind of Sporting, too. He plays a lot of video games.
Dominance- High. He's the boss of me. My AlphaDog. What Dad says GOES. But I don't think this applies to Mom so much.
Intelligence- High. He's the smartest dad I know! A great problem solver.
Emotions- Moderate. He's mostly tough like me who is a ManDog but sometimes he gets soft and sweet with Mom. Yuck.
Sociability- High. He also has lots of friends and is very friendly with strangers even.
Energy- Variable. Dad works hard at his job so when he's home he's usually tired and likes to rest or do restfully fun things like watch movies or play videogames. Which is alright with me since he's the best lap ever to sleep on!

And now for Scarlett. They say she's a Terrier but I think that's just the french way of saying "Terror."
Dominance- High. She doesn't always listen to MomDad. Sometimes she will listen to Mom more than Dad though. And when we play Smackdown she's usually pretty dominant over me by climbing over my body and whacking me sideways with her whole butt.
Intelligence- High. She finds things in the yard that I guess have always been there but I never knew it before! And she's very selective in who she will listen to and when.
Emotions- Low. Well, she's hyper most of the time but sometimes she likes to stop and cuddle with Mom a lot. Sort of like a split personality. Does that mean high or low on this emotional scale?
Sociability- High. Like me, she loves other people. But she hasn't had much exposure to other dogs since she graduated from Puppy Preschool so when she hears or sees other dogs or strangers while on walks, she barks like a loco dog. I don't know what's wrong with her.
Energy- HIGH HIGH HIGH! She's almost ALWAYS going and for someone with just a little stump of a tail, she's always wagging it and going crazy!

Thanks, Deefor! That was fun!

I Been a Busy Boy

Whew. I have been really busy lately. So much is going on in my life and there's not been a lot of time to take and upload pictures. So, you'll just have to settle for the written description instead.

We dogs had fun at GrandpaDave's in the country, chasing the goats and birds and other dogs and stuff. We all got to go to the airport with him to pick up MomDad but I was the only dog allowed to run around the car while he was driving - the girls had to stay in their kennels while I helped GrandpaDave drive and chew gum.

We got back at home with MomDad and it was nice to be home, napping on my couch, humping my monkey in my own room, sleeping in my own bed next to my own Dad.

A few days later, Mom told us that Ophelia was going to live with GrandpaDave! LUCKY! That's so not fair. I should go there since I am the ManDog. But Mom said that Ophelia wasn't very happy and wasn't fitting in here with me and Scarlett and the kitties and that GrandpaDave would be so very happy if she went to live with him. When she put it that way, I started to understand. Ophelia would just bark and bark all the time and run away from Scarlett and wouldn't play with toys or anything. And then she started doing something even too gross for me! She started eating her poos! YUCK! Mom said it was because she was nervous and unhappy at our house but that doesn't make sense to me...if you're nervous and unhappy, just dig through the trash or shred some kleenexes or whine until you feel better - don't eat your poos! Nasty.

So Ophi's been at GrandpaDave's for a few days now and I hear that she's very happy there. She plays and guards the house with the Great Pyranees dogs, Xena and Bear, and shares GrandpaDave's lap with his kitties. I'm glad she's happy there. I hope I can still visit and play with her sometimes.

You're probably wondering how Scarlett felt about Ophelia moving away? Yeah...she barely even noticed. The only thing she noticed was that half of "her" new toys had disappeared (when Ophelia came to our house she brought her giant basket of toys that Scarlett immediately claimed as her own). Scarlett's too hyper to notice much, really.

We've been working hard on Squirell Patrol in our yard lately. There are three now that taunt us by jumping from the fences to the trees in our yard and flapping their tails at us annoyingly. We just bark and jump and try to figure out how to yank him down so we can catch them.

Well, Mom has started going to her own BabyDoctor to get some medicine put in her every two weeks. She says she might be pretty tired for a long time so I'm going to have to help her out and keep the squirrels away from her a lot. I might not have much time for blogging. But I'll keep checking your blogs and you keep checking back here from time to time. Check out mom's other blog if you want to know what's going on with her.

See ya!

Busy Vacation

*pant pant* *pant pant* *pant pant*
I am very busy at GrandpaDave's. There is so much to do! He has 60 acres for us to patrol and lots of birds and goats and stuff. I don't have time to talk about it all because I need to get back to sniffing out this new coyote. Here's GrandpaDave's account (he started calling us the Wild Dogs):

Dobby doesn’t like to eat when he comes to my house. Ophi is a little that way too and all three don’t like eating out the bowls. BUT—I noticed that they are all over me when I am eating and if I drop a crumb or two they are on it like stink on a skunk. So--- we invented a new and very exciting eating technique that everyone (all wild dogs that is) eagerly participate in. I swept my kitchen floor first. Then when it is time for them to eat, I spread two hand full’s of their food across the clean floor and they vacuum it in seconds. They think they are getting a find – it brings out the wild dog hunting instincts and it is fun. Oh – I also get freshly polished floors. As I type this, they are dining on the floor of the deck. Now this is a real wild dog hunt as it is outside and I spread a lot of food in all directions so they have to hunt for it and they do—then they can go down the stairs and hunt for real wild things to put in their mouths and recycle in nature. Happy wild dogs. Xena and Bear usually joins the pack and then they all run around the house a time or two and up and down the hill to the barn and back… Dobby will go to the fence and stare at the goats and when they get irritated at that they charge the fence in a mock attack. Dobby backs off and barks. Scarlett looks on with amazement and Ophi runs to the top of the deck stairs and calls out the game like a sports announcer.

There is a real wild dog, a coyote, that has been hunting mice all day in the hay field and every once in a while Xena or Bear catches his sent and come charging around the house and bark at the coyote. Then the wild dogs come to their support and start barking here in the house. They look a little confused and embarrassed when I ask them if they know why they are barking. Now when they are outside on the deck – they seem to sent the coyote to and actually know why they are barking and they look out across the field and just dare the coyote to come into the yard. You know how tough Dobby thinks he is and especially with Bear and Xena backing him up. Tough guy.

I just asked the pack if they wanted to go with me tomorrow to pick you guys up [at the airport] and IMMEDATELY Ophi barked twice and Dobby headed for the garage door. Scarlett just ran with Dobby running circles around him as they both traversed the house. So it was two votes for and one abstention. The wild pack will be with me when we pick you up.

Here We Are!

Check us out! Chillin' at GrandpaDave's...

On Vacation

MomDad had to leave town to go to some fancy hospital to help Mom get not-so-sick. So we packed me, Scarlett and Ophelia up and headed out to GrandpaDave's! Here's an update from Grandpa Dave after our ride to his house:

Somebody pooped in Dobby’s kennel on the drive from your house to my house. It couldn’t possibly be one of your dogs as they all did DOGS-OUT for quite a while while I was loading dog food and the toy bag in my car. They in fact were out there so long that Ophelia was barking and barking terribly annoyed at my lack of service in letting her back in. Anyway, Dobby got a short bath – from the belly down and the kennel cleaned out and the bed is in the washer as we I type this. Scarlet got slapped right away by Lacy (cat) but there has been a short truce declared. Bob and Kendal (other cats) are now where to be found.

I introduced the troop to Bear and Xena (two Great Pyranees dogs). Xena got a head ache and retreated to Xena Hill. She came down a little later to pee on a spot that Scarlet peed on a few minutes ago. Dobby ran out of pee. He peed his way all the way around the house trying to mark higher than Bear does but to no avail. You know, it just isn’t fair. Bear's belly is higher off the ground than Dobby’s ear tips. But anyway, Dobby tried. After getting over the shock, Bear kept trying to get a game of chase or jump or just anything with Dobby but Dobby was too busy trying to pee higher and higher. Bear is very excited to have play partners.

Right now, there is a small dog in every part of the down stairs as they check out the new territory and all the smells. Dobby IMMEDIATELY went to where the cat bowl usually is but I had outsmarted him and put it up before leaving this afternoon. He dug something out of the wood box by the fireplace to chew on. He coughed a couple of times but by the time I got over there he either swallowed it or spit it our some place. I just heard a tenitive ‘woof’ from Scarlet in the family room. I be she has Bob or Lacy ‘treed’ under one of the coffee or end tables.

This is going to be fun!

And then this morning:

Well the night was uneventful mainly because I had your pack spend the night in their kennels. The cats had all disappeared and the dogs were hyper. Now we are sitting on the deck with the stairs blocked so no one can go down to eat bird poop that seems to be available for the tasty treat that Dobby seems to think it is. We had social time earlier with Bear and Xena. Xena is curious but reserved. Bear wants to get a game going but these little dogs move too fast for him. When he tries to incite a game – suddenly the small dog runs under him and is on his back side. He can’t move that fast and gets confused especially because there are three of them and they are EVERYWHERE! Everyone got a giant (Great Pyrenees size) dog cookie (milk bone) a few minutes ago. Dobby and Scarlet snarfed theirs down but Ophelia is delicately savoring hers. Scarlet keeps volunteering to help her with it but so far she is hording hers and not sharing. We are hanging on the deck, alternately barking at the emu, the goats, other things unseen and wanting to get back in the house. Lacy is inside the door giving the evil eye to all three of our guests and Bob is up on the counter looking very worried. Kendal is holed up in the basement just daring any of them to come down to her liar.

SCARLET JUST POOPED!!!! GOOD SCARLET!